Thursday, August 19, 2010

Is Obama a Muslim? Yes we can!

According the Pew Research Center there is widespread and spreading confusion over the religion of President Barack Obama. Eighteen per cent of Americans say Mr. Obama is a Muslim (up 7% from six months ago), while only 34% knew he was Christian (down from 48%). Now some of you may believe this is yet another example of the growing plague of stupidity that is rampaging through the United States, but I think it is due to the growing influence of Islam in America and the consequent decrease of the power of Christianity.

People want their president to be like them. The fact that more Americans think President Obama is a Muslim may simply reflect the fact that more Americans are converting to Islam. To find out just how crazy my idea is, I too turned to the Pew Research Center ( to conduct another poll. Here are some of the findings:

• 63% of those polled believed that Rahm Emanuel is the unborn child referenced in Isaiah 7:14

• 87% identified the religion of Rush Limbaugh 87% Republican, while 3% answered Methodist

• 54% identified Sarah Palin’s religion as Assemblies of God (AG), while 11% said Assemblies of God (USA)

• 99% correctly identified Ronald McDonald as Irish Catholic

• 87% of Americans surveyed could not identify the religion of the Pope, though the same number did know that a bear shits in the woods, and

• while 97% of Americans could identify the religion of the Sephardic Chief Rabbi of Israel as Jewish, only 2% could further identify him as Sephardic.

What does this tell us? I asked the Pepe le Pew Research Center to ask this question also, and it turns out that 100% of Americans had no idea, while another 75% had no opinion, which leaves me free to make up whatever I want. And what I want is to scare the crap out of you over how stupid, bigoted, and xenophobic Americans are.

So let’s recap: President Obama was almost half Christian six months ago, while today he is only one third Christian. This on-going loss of Christ is of great comfort to American Muslims who are trying to impose Sharia on America in order to get the First Lady to stop going sleeveless and start wearing a chador in hopes of increasing chador imports into this country and thus help improve the economy of Chadoria.

America: love it or leave it, it really won’t help either way.


Steve Frazee said...

You are a statistical genius!

Kathleen said...

Very funny! What a great comment on that "News Item". Our newspapers here in New Zealand carried it (as a tiny thing down the side of an internal page) the other day and I was hoping to read some humorous follow-up. Thank you.

Sandy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Sandy said...

Irish Catholic? With a name like McDonald, I'd think Scottish Presbyterian. But then I didn't realize Obama was a Muslim, either.

(sorry for double post, hit wrong button)