Friday, March 02, 2007

Poetic License (Plates)

Standing in line to renew my car registration I couldn’t help notice the dozen or more license plate choices offered to me. For an additional fee I could replace the standard license plate with one that advertises my passion for an array of causes from save the bares to save the fetuses. While I waited for my turn to register my car, I began to think of other plates the state might offer motorists. Here are a few of my suggestions:

“Chose Death.” This plate would feature unlocked seatbelts in a circle with a slash through it. Money would go to support safe driving programs in high schools.

“Choose Hate.” This plate would feature a swastika (the Nazi version not the Hindu one), a Confederate Flag, and a Flaming Cross. Money would go to groups that promote anti-Semitism, racism, and homophobia.

“Choose Me.” This plate would have a clear plastic sleeve into which you can put a photograph of yourself. Funds would go to Narcissists of America.

“Choose Ignorance.” At the center of this plate is a large open book in a circle with a slash through it. This plate would support efforts to cut educational funding.

“Choose Peace” would feature a photo of Mahatma Gandhi. Money would go to peace education.

“Choose War” would compliment the Choose Peace plate and feature a mushroom cloud in the shape of a dollar sign. Funds raised from this plate would go to portable nuke research and development.

“Choose Sanity” with a genderless person sitting in meditation would be a good idea. Money would go to funding contemplative studies programs in local schools.

“Choose Something” would have no picture just text, and would support Americans In Support of Action. A balancing plate would read, “Choosing Nothing,” and would support the people who want to drop out of consumerist culture. Ironic, no?

“Choiceless,” featuring a portrait of J. Krishnamurti would be a hit with me. Money would support his foundation.

My final suggestion is an alternative to the standard Choose Life plate featuring a smiling baby. My design would feature a smiling young woman next to a blastocyst with the words YOU CHOOSE over them.

As always you are free to push any of these ideas in your state. And if you have ideas of your own please post them on the Blogger version of Toto.

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